2011 Word of the Year

Release! by Destinys Agent, on Flickr

Now announcing (drumroll please) the year of...

Release and Reconnect

Yes, I know. TWO words. That would be cheating if these things had rules.

Up to yesterday I had just the one word, release, that seemed so right for the simplifying I need to continue. What happened? On impulse I called a friend of a friend, who I have not seen or spoken to in two years, to ask her about yoga classes. We chatted happily about other things and when she mentioned that a goal for this year was for her to "reconnect with friends" I knew that reconnect was another word for me too.

In 2011 I will release stuff, obligations, people who drain me and the word 'should'.

I will reconnect with old friends (most of my friends and family are scattered across the world), and with activities and interests that have been pushed aside in the daily rush.

How did I know what my words were? When I read or heard them I just knew they were right. They resonated with me and had a thrill of excitement about them. More than Clarity which was the first word I thought of. Perhaps they will bring me clarity!

Tomorrow I'll post a little about my plans. Until then, what's your word? Or two words? Or phrase?

Here is Lisa Call's post on her word of the year.
And here is Christine Kane's post that gave me my first word and has lots of ideas for word(s) of the year.

2010 Word of the Year: Dedication

Reaching for the Sky

© Caroline Roberts, 2009

I've been reading lots of blog posts where people have a word for the year and I thought it might be fun. I thought and I thought and I came up with nothing. Then it hit me in the dead of night: Dedication. Not only is it a great word that encapsulates all the things I have in mind for 2010 - a kind of mission statement in one word - but it also comes with its very own theme tune! Let me explain. Growing up in the UK there was a kids program on the BBC called Record Breakers, all about the Guiness book of records and featuring people who were making record breaking attempts. The end sequence featured the show's host, Roy Castle, playing "Dedication". I wish I could find a clip of it, but the lyrics went "Dedication's what you need, if you want to be a record breaker!"

Undefeated by my 2009 goal review I set some goals for this year.

Art
For my art I want to be productive. I will record my studio hours and set myself the goal of 10 studio hours a week. Theoretically I could do more but I am going to start achievable and modify this as needed.

I plan to post to this blog three times a week and talk more about art, paints, studio practice and abstraction. I want to see the reader numbers grow and some great discussions started! The studio can be a terribly isolated place.

Family
My children are young and they each have areas they need help with. My daughter is learning to read and write. My son adores math and needs to be challenged in it, but needs help with handwriting.

Adventure
Sometimes adventure has to be planned in or busy-ness takes over. Our plans to date are:
Florida in March (hopefully to see the shuttle launch).
A road trip to Yellowstone in the summer.
Five state park visits with bikes or just to walk.

Exercise
I will do some form of exercise three times a week. I have never been a regular, consistent exerciser - I set crazy goals and train for things like a marathon and then, when the big goal is out the way, I stop. How stupid is that? But without the goal I can't keep up the effort. This year I will become consistent with the help of a trainer and progress tracking.

Giving Back (volunteering)
This area of my life is too big right now. I have a long list of commitments and I will keep them but my studio time is suffering for it and I resent that. The tasks I will volunteer for are swim team co-chair, Fall market logistics, library duty and math stars at school and the graphic design work I do for the Houston Civic Symphony. Maybe science fair for my daughter's class... see how these things creep in?!

I reserve the right to alter any of these goals as the year progresses and circumstances change! It may not be obvious from the outside but my goals really can be summarized in my word of the year. To me, this year is about dedicating myself to the things that are truly, deeply important to me - my family and my art. Everything else is to be given up as commitments come to an end.

Lessons from 2009

Twigs against the sky, taken at Enchanted Rock state park, Texas

I have set goals and reviewed my year the last couple of years and I find it a big help. Partly to acknowledge what I DID achieve, but it also helps me fine-tune my goals for the following year. Last year I posted some goals for the year on this blog for accountability, let's see how that went:

• Get a schedule and routines in place so the little things in life don't disturb my studio time. And by 'little things' I do not mean the kids. - I didn't define this one properly - what did I mean by a schedule and routine? How detailed? I knew what I meant at the time I'm sure, but this shows me I need to be a lot more specific when I make my goals.

• Get a solid body of work together. - And that would mean what exactly?

• Write and post at least two blog entries a week. - Er, no. I posted around once a week last year.

• Go to at least two exhibitions or galleries a month. - I probably did go to a museum or exhibition 24 times last year.

• Read 50 books, keeping a simple list of them. Preferably books I already own. - My list fell behind a bit, but I read at least 30 books in 2009.

• Reread I'd Rather Be in the Studio and get art business organized. - Yep, did this one! Also took Alyson's Blast Off! class and Go, get organized classes. Both excellent.

• Talk to my local independent coffee shop about an exhibition. - Not only talked to them but also had an exhibition there last March. Yay!

• Host an Open Studio. - No, didn't do this. I feel that I should have 'more' or 'better' work to show before I do this. It would mean inviting friends and neighbors to my studio and I feel like that has to be more... what? more impressive? I'm being perfectionist about it. Maybe I should just start out small with a few invited people, most of whom I am very comfortable with.

• Devise (and then follow) a study plan to hone my painting and drawing skills. Perhaps a skill a month? - I love to plan and then ignore my plans! I learnt that I need to work on whatever is needed for the current or the next piece of work. Planning it all out ahead of time is restrictive and totally unnecessary, I am not a beginner any more and I need to leave that comfort blanket behind.

• Get to the gym or go running at least three times a week. - Didn't do so great on this until I revised it to "some form of exercise three times a week". That worked and then I joined the gym at my husband's workplace which comes with free training schedules and that was even better. I learnt not to use "at least" in my goals - it means I can never, ever be done! If I say "three times" and I go four times, well I get a bonus!

Achievements/What worked

• Working on the Fall Market was fun and informative, particularly as my main co-worker was so committed and professional in her approach.
• I started recording the hours I spend in the studio this Fall and that has helped me focus on getting in there. I do not set a goal, the simple record is motivation enough. Once I'm in there I work.
• Making my exercise goal more specific made a big difference. Sure, it would be great if I exercised more than three times a week, but I need to set goals that I can actually achieve!
• Exhibiting my work at the coffee shop taught me a lot through working with the owners and I would like to do that again. I showed and talked about my work to people outside of school and friends for the first time and sold several pieces.

What didn't work

• I volunteered for too many itty, bitty jobs at school in September and now I am suffering for that. Not because they take up a lot of time but because that's a lot of little stuff to keep track of.
• I let myself be persuaded into something I wasn't entirely sure about with someone who turns out to be known to over-commit and under-perform. I can say "NO" and I can choose who I work with.

I learnt a lot from reviewing this list and the year in general:

1. The more specific the goal the more likely it is I will do it and know it is done. Clearly I was out of the room when the SMART goals were discussed at work many years ago! Just goes to show that you can know the theory, but putting it into practice is something else entirely.
2. Recording my studio hours was very successful and I need to keep doing that. Recording what I achieved turned out to be more motivating to me than setting a time goal.
3. Planning our weekends in the Fall was successful in getting us out on our bikes and into the fabulous state parks around us. We need to plan at least one weekend a month, especially outside of baseball season.
4. Visiting Manchester over the summer made me aware that I do not always take advantage of the events and opportunities around me. I should look at everything that is available to me in Houston and try to take it all in. Who knows how long we will be here?
5. I will plan what tasks I will volunteer for ahead of time and sign up for those and those ONLY.
6. I will not work with people who are not committed to the task and to doing their absolute best under the circumstances. I volunteer for most of the tasks I can take on, I can choose who I will work with.
7. I will not work with someone else without a clear demarcation of responsibilities and an initial planning meeting.
8. When I see warning signs of an issue I should march straight towards it and challenge it. Calming down a little first and looking at what I want to get out of the challenge would probably be helpful too. Ignoring warning signs is stupid, these issues do not go away.
9. For the first time ever I asked someone why they were mad at me after a week or so of being growled at. Normally I would wait until it all 'went away'. Turned out they weren't mad at me, it was a whole other issue and we had a conversation that has affected me deeply.
10. Questioning why I avoid something - a person, an issue, a task - really helps me figure out what my fears are about it and what I really, truly want from it. Then the stress and procrastination is reduced. But not eliminated, sadly.

Goals for 2010 coming up on Friday!

A visual person's "to do" list

Moleskine planner

Finally, thanks to Nick at todoodlist, (yes, that's an affiliate link), I have figured out a planning/to do list too that works for me. It's a humble plain moleskine and a pencil: you can see it there in the photo. I took some of Nick's ideas - the doodled "to do" list and the notebook with tabs - and added some things I needed, like a section for sketching/scribbling and a section to record studio time. Unlike the planners in the stores it is totally adaptable. My calendar is on my phone so I have no use for all those diary pages!

Todoodling is a planning method for anyone who thinks mind-map fashion rather than list fashion, or who just likes doodling with pencil on paper. I tried electronic task lists but they didn't show how everything linked up the way I saw it in my head. Then I tried planning in Bento (a database program for Mac) that put my actions into iCal but it was still too linear.

Below is a photo of my studio time record, an idea from Lisa Call's blog. Oh, and while I was looking around her blog for the correct link I came across a great post on Taskboards which I'm going to investigate further. Lisa juggles a full-time job with her art-making and I am in total awe of all that she achieves.

Studio time record

The Changing Year

Phases (work in progress)

Caroline Roberts

The seasons swing around and I realize there are only 3 weeks of school holidays left. How did that come around so fast?

This year my youngest starts school full-time and so, assuming I can get the little night owl out of bed, they will both be on the bus at 7:20, returning at 3:10. The same week that they go back I start two classes at Glassell. This term I am taking Color and I'm excited about it - this class has been passed down from Josef Albers.

I will also be taking a Composition workshop, which seems to be a combination of lectures and museum visits lasting only 6 weeks. Between Dianne Mize's excellent series of posts on her Compose blog and this class I am sure to improve and become more confident in my compositional skills.

Excitement about returning to the studio is building up, slowly and deliberately. I do not want to wander in there on the first day back and pick at things or fidget around and finally give up only to check email. I want to hit the ground running with work that will warm me up and get my painting form back quickly. So far my plans include:

• Working with the Guerra acrylics. I ordered these some time ago but haven't had time to work with them since they arrived. They need more preparation than regular tube acrylics which will, I hope, result in more control over paint consistency.
• Small acrylic panel 'sketches' based on the sketchbook drawings and photos from the summer.
• Tidy the studio.
• Small acrylic thumbnails of Herne's Oak focusing on value. I think this is the key to heightening drama in this piece. Then, once I have the value structure in place, working on texture in the background to imply a huge, ancient forest.
• Finish Phases.

Drawing Every Day

Frangipani sketch, charcoal and graphite on paper

©2009 Caroline Roberts

One of my big goals this summer is to make a habit of drawing something every day. I know that the practice will improve that skill and give me so much more range as a painter. Three days ago I got going and drew a cup and saucer from life, and yesterday I drew this Frangipani flower from a photograph. Sometimes I found it easier to keep turning the picture 90 degrees - I find it easier to judge a curve against the vertical than the horizontal for some reason. I'm pretty pleased with this and (if approved) it will be on the cover of my sister's wedding invitation.

castle reward chart

A quick detour - the above scan is my 'reward' chart that I made to encourage myself in forming my new drawing habit. I'm trying to emphasize visually to myself how every action I take to improve a skill or make connections will help build my 'castle'. Hey, it works for the kids! I made one for my daughter but she started filling hers in from the turrets. Guess I should have started with turrets in the air and built down to the ground too!

Blasting off with a Dream

Vision Board

Did I mention that I'm taking the Blast Off! class with Alyson Stanfield yet? Wow, what an experience it has been and we're only at day 4. I'm afraid to ask what comes next.

Day 2's assignment was to create a Vision Board (see above) which I finally finished today. I'm really pleased with it and surprised by some of the images that made the cut. What is a patchwork quilt doing there? Or a stack of teacups?! I don't know yet why they are on the board, but they evoke memories of making things with my grandmother: sewing projects and such.

Which brings me to something else. Just as I thought I had the direction of my work all figured out, this exercise brought my loves of lettering and fabric back into the light. What is that all about? I thought I'd managed to focus on one skill area at last.

They say you can tell the power of a dream by the resistance it creates in you. If that's right then this dream points true north. My Inner Editor (that hateful beast) keeps screaming "You can't do this with children! This kind of yoga, outdoor, artist life is for singles in their twenties. Grow up!". Nasty, isn't she.

Defying gravity is hard work.

Summer Schedules

Pencils and sketchpads at the ready!

Ah, June. It's officially Summer now: swim team is under way and school is out on Thursday. I haven't been in the studio for about 4 weeks, with my youngest begin out of school already, and it has really been getting to me. I have new bodies of work to get going on here! It's very ironic since I just wrote about finding time to create, in fact I wrote that as a reminder to myself that this would be happening and I would need to adapt.

Having been reading Twyla Tharp's The Creative Habit, it finally got through to my slow brain that I need to reframe my thoughts. I was thinking "How can I get studio time?" which was totally defeating. I reframed this to "I have lost my studio and the ability to paint, how can I still create?". I looked at what I can still do - I don't bring my acrylics into the house for safety reasons, but sketchbooks and pencils do not spark my daughter (age 4) to demand that I 'share' my art materials with her. She has her own.

I know I need to spend more time drawing from life and I am trying to view this as an extended sketching trip, collecting material to use in studio paintings later. I have never worked quite this way before. I like my studio and without the location prompting me to work I find it hard to settle into creating. I get distracted easily, and not just by the kids. The computer is the worst, but even the housework can get me on a bad day. Working in other locations is a skill I need to develop however.

All the necessary supplies have been moved into the house so I am ready to go as soon as I've set the kids up with their own projects. I am going to try out colored pencils and little sketching trips. I may even grow to like the watercolor pencils I got so long ago!

How often do you look back through your sketchbooks? In my case, not very often, so I will also look back through older sketchbooks and pull out notes relevant to my new work.

Finishing creative projects in the house is something else that can be done. I think that clearing these things up allows some space to clear in your mind so that new ideas can come in. I have some photo collages to finish and reference photos and clippings to sort out - how about you?

Tomorrow I start Alyson Stanfield's Blast Off class, which is very exciting. I have had art school projects to drive me to the easel for the last 3 years but now I know that I am ready to work alone. Since I can't get in the studio to paint anyhow I will enjoy working on goal-setting.

If the school holidays affect your work, how do you cope? If you cannot create as you normally would right now, how can you reframe your thoughts and find new ways to create and move forward?

Ideas and other temptations

My desk. This was taken right before Hurricane Ike - the hurricane tracker is on the screen!

"Good ideas are only given to you for a limited amount of time. If you don't act on them, they belong to someone else."
Steven Spielberg

I have a confession to make: I cannot finish a thing. Shiny new ideas are my addiction. But when my son's teacher told us "he starts a lot of projects but doesn't finish any" I realized I have to search out some solutions. If I can learn how to finish more of my work perhaps I can help him.

My current perspective is that I don't finish stuff because I don't have enough time. I read countless productivity tips and try organizing, reorganizing, scheduling, planning, making lists... In other words, following the cookie crumb trail of New Ideas. In my mind, each new tip is The One, the one that will change my world from upstream struggle to success. I'm slowly realizing that this perspective is false. I do have enough time - I just have too many ideas. By trying to act on all of them I am failing to truly act on any of them. I have to let some go and keep the ideas that are a great fit for my personality, interests and abilities.

Part of the problem is finding that fit. There are lots of things I like to do, and even more things that I could do. But that range of abilities and interests is a poisoned chalice - I always have too many projects on the go: so much choice has paralyzed me mentally. I need to learn to select ideas and projects to drop (and eventually not start!) - to use the To Stop list more effectively.

Join me on my quest to figure out how an 'idea junkie' can learn to channel Completer-Finisher behaviour, at least occasionally. Wish me, and my son, luck!

Onward and Upward

Pine Tree, 36" by 36", acrylic on canvas, ©2007 Caroline Roberts

"My challenge for you today is to replace your “wants” with what you NEED to get there. When you catch yourself dreaming, write down a list of everything you need to do that would make that dream a reality—and then start doing them, one at a time."

Dan on Empty Easel: What we Want Versus What we Need: The Artist’s Dilemma

Since the end of my class at Glassell and with summer looming over me I have been planning a little, then this morning I saw the above quote on Empty Easel and it really kicked me into planning mode.

My want is to feel that my painting is of a high quality and that I have a language of marks and shapes and colors that is my own.

I'm part-way there.

Now I need to make a plan of what I need to do to get my 'want'. Inspired by Kim Bennett's Back to the Drawing Board plan I have been thinking of little actions I can take over the summer:

• Work in my sketchbook every day, focussing on shapes and composition - I like Kim's idea to do this over breakfast. I also plan to do this by the pool during swim team practice. I'm sure sunscreen marks on the page will spark some inspiration!
• Revisit PIne Tree (above) and develop it into a small series.
• Explore the new Guerra paints I ordered from their wonderful paint store in New York. These arrived within a week of that blog entry but are still sitting on my desk unopened.

I also realized what is on the other side of the Dip: a feeling that however hard it gets I will never give up painting and struggling to express myself in visual forms. As Georgia O'Keeffe put it:

“I found I could say things with color and shapes that I couldn't say any other way - things I had no words for.”

link: Georgia O'Keeffe quotes

How can I find time to create?!

My Ideas Board as of this morning

Friends and neighbors often ask me "How do you find time to paint? I don't know how you do all this". Mostly it just takes determination, but here a few tips I picked up along the way:

Finding Time

The most common advice I see for fitting in a new activity is to schedule it as an appointment, and then keep that appointment as you would any other. I agree with this - it works and over time will make creative time an essential habit. It sounds so simple but there is a first step that is almost never mentioned: before you start making appointments (only to break them or let them slide by because something else gets in the way), you must make a commitment. You have to be committed to keeping those appointments or rescheduling only if you have to.

Vague ideas to be 'more creative' will not happen. Make the time. Perhaps schedule a creative playdate with a friend, preferably one who is not too chatty!

If you think you have NO time at all in your week try this: keep an hour-by-hour note of your activities throughout the day - from waking to sleeping. If you have a job to go to you can simply blank that section of time out of course! Note down your energy levels too - are you buzzing in the mornings or are you a night owl? You need to know your best time of day to work. From these notes you should be able to identify a window or two when you could create - perhaps instead of watching TV or surfing the web.

Location, Location, Location

Do you have a place where you do your creative work? It doesn't have to be a dedicated studio, it can be the kitchen table, but does it have good light? Do you enjoy working there? There may be some simple changes you can make, like rotating a desk so you get more light from the window.

Where are your supplies stored? They should be close by your work area and all together. Being able to quickly pull out a box and get going makes a huge difference.

This all brings me to one thing: distractions. What are yours? Mine are the computer, annoying levels of mess and New Projects. I can wander off on a New Project tangent for days. Try and have your work area isolated from your main distractions!

Flexibility, a.k.a. Yoga for Schedules

As my friend Anne says, "Stuff happens". Actually she isn't as polite about it as that, but she's right - stuff does happen. Sometimes the stuff is out of our control and all we can do is cope. Sometimes the stuff is actually bad planning - taking on way too much all at the same time.

For these reasons, our schedules need to be able to adapt and then have the creative windows reappear. Some things you can try:

1. Have an essentials list - these are the things you absolutely MUST do each day or week in order to feel balanced and sane. This list might include taking a bath, swimming, drinking enough water, writing in a journal for 15 minutes or spending 15 minutes a day with your sketchbook. These are the things that you will keep up even when the world goes crazy around you so that you will be able to cope.
2. If time crunches become too regular then make a "to stop" list - a list of activities you will give up so that you can find more time to be creative.
3. Write out your commitments for the next 3-12 months and keep a rolling calendar of these - don't let your 'current projects' list get too long: 3 is more than enough and yes, major family activities are a project. Are there any clashes? Do too many projects fall due the same week or month?

Small Steps

But what if your schedule goes up in the air like this - how do you get back into the studio? When all is chaos, do NOT stop doing creative things, just scale them down. One secret in getting back to work is to never truly stop. Try to spend moments with a sketchbook, or flick through your idea books. Stressed? Tidy and clean your workspace so that you are ready to go when you are better able to focus and be creative.

Getting Back into your Stride

If you didn't manage to keep working it can be hard to get going again. Perhaps you lack an idea or can't remember where you left off. Believe me when I say that the hardest part is starting - even if you rearrange your pens or paints for 30 minutes you will have started. For some reason a tidy work surface is a magnet for new creative work. If that doesn't do it for you, pull out a book and try a new technique or play with color exercises. Spend your entire, scheduled creative time doing something, however hard it feels. It will get easier.

I find it helps to have some kind of goals and long-term structure to my creative time. For a while I got this from external courses, but now I have a self-imposed goal to direct my work: I'm working on a series of paintings on the theme of trees. Even without access to classes a structure can be found: Krista Meister has set herself a self-directed curriculum of art studies. Very inspiring!

And what do I, personally do?

I try not to schedule too much into a single week or over-commit on other activities. I do volunteer at the school but mainly in the classroom and never more than I am happy to do.

It helps that my studio space is in the garage, away from the house, the phone and the computer. And only 10 seconds commute time. I go out there with my coffee as soon as the youngest is in school (9a.m.) and stay there until it's time to pick her up (12 or 2:30). If I run out of ideas or things to work on I tidy up a bit, make some fresh coffee and then push some ideas around in a sketchbook.

Writing this post has been a great reminder for me - 'stuff' has really happened and I'm reminded that I need to re-focus on the most important things and put the rest on hold.

Some blogs that have helped me treat my creative time as working time and learn to be a freelancer:
Productive Flourishing
Zen Habits

To my blog and its readers

With a commitment to building a more vibrant blog, I signed up for the 4-week Blog Triage class with Cynthia Morris and Alyson Stanfield. Today’s assignment is to describe the people I want to visit and read my blog.

I once read an excellent Wanted Ad for a house, which I really enjoyed reading and felt was a very creative way of describing, and making real, a desire or need. I thought I would write my assignment in a similar fashion.

Wanted: Fabulous blog readers for discussions late into the night

I'm looking for a community of blog readers for discussions about art and the creative life. You would be interested in art, whether artists, crafters, collectors, curators - people who love art and want to talk about it.

You are curious people who want to discuss all kinds of art-related topics. We may not always agree but when we disagree, however strongly, it is with respect.

You come from across the globe and are all ages. Many of you will be people I would never normally have met because we come from such different places or cultures. You are at all levels of the creative life and come here to learn and to help.

We discuss materials, art-making, art-viewing, exhibitions, books, life-art balance, learning, all kinds of things via comments and on each others' blogs. However, many of you do not have a blog but enjoy being part of an online community and resource and you create profiles so you can do just that. One day I hope that some of you will write guest posts.

I hear that back in the 60s and 70s everyone knew everyone else in the New York art world and there were a lot of discussions in bars late at night. That sense of community and cooperation seems to have been lost for many reasons. Maybe, just maybe, we can capture a little of that here, online. Maybe we can discuss art late a night because well, it's always late-at-night somewhere online isn't it?! It will be bring-your-own-timezone-appropriate-drink though. Right now mine is coffee -cheers and welcome!

Reading "the dip"

Mosaic ceiling in Central Park
Originally uploaded by Caro R

It's great to be on spring break, we all needed the rest. I snapped this pic on our long walk through the park today, following the things Jack and Annie see in "Blizzard of the Blue Moon", one of the Magic Tree House books. We found Baldo, the angel fountain and Belvedere Castle, and on Tuesday we'll go to the Cloisters to see the unicorn tapestries.

This evening I read "the dip" by Seth Godin. His description of the dip reminded me of the 10,000 hours of practice it takes to become really great at something. Not that getting through the dip takes that long, but that most people will give up in the middle of the dip when they get to be just OK at something and are not prepared to pay the price to become great. Seth also talks about the need to quit sometimes: to quit the things that aren't working or the things that we are not passionate about. This is something that I have tried to do more of recently, although I have thought of it as 'focusing'. I feel encouraged to continue my efforts - I am so curious that I find it hard to be as single-minded as I need to be.

The book is very short and approachable and I read it in about an hour, but I'll be thinking about its implications for much, much longer.

A Phase painting in progress

Small section of Phase I

Yesterday I had five whole, uninterrupted hours in the studio. Fantastic. Forgot to eat of course and only stopped when my head went all dizzy. I started a 20" by 50" painting inspired by the music Piano Phase by Steve Reich. A group of three curves is altered in 2 ways - proximity and curvature - in an out-of-phase manner - one goes through 2 cycles, the other 3, over the length of the painting. Perhaps not entirely unexpectedly, if I think of sound waves, this sets up an interference pattern - a pattern within a pattern. So the color order is based on this interference pattern - 3 colors can be arranged in 6 different ways and there were 6 combinations of proximity and curvature, including the base combination.

The above photograph is where I had to stop. The ultramarine is the ground which will show through the colors to a degree. I do not want this to be a flat 'pattern' - I want it to look hand-crafted and to have a little depth. So no tape or flat paint here, although Illustrator was employed as a design tool.

Painting the underlying curves

Yes, in this shot the canvas is awful slack. I made this canvas myself - the first time I've made one this big and awkwardly shaped, but I had a very specific size in mind for the piece. I did cheat and use pre-primed canvas - I really did not want to spend a couple of days just priming. Spritzing the back with water soon had that canvas nice and taut though. A little more practice and I'll get it right.

I had a week blissfully clear of appointments and non-studio stuff and what happened? My son got sick. Some kind of virus that's really just a cold but comes with a fever that spikes on and off for, wait for it... FIVE days. Just as I was thinking I should take a look at all those doors that opened but I haven't walked through yet. So, Universe, what is it now? I was going to call a few of those people I should have called long ago: and now? Maybe tomorrow he'd like to sit on the studio sofa and draw while I get some painting done.

Still, have finally decided that my daughter will go to the pre-K program at the public school from the fall. Some part of me gave up feeling bad and selfish because I want that extra time. Hey, if the worst-case scenarios come true it will be handy having them on the same schedule, and the same if best-case scenarios come true. Like I get enough customers for my paintings that I need to paint more hours to keep up with demand. A girl can (and will) dream!

Somewhat linked to that dream I have another goal for this year:
Actually label and file away expense receipts as they happen, keeping some kind of rudimentary accounts spreadsheet.
Yep, I thought about doing that all this year but when I came to do my taxes... yes, you guessed it, no receipts in the folder. Even if sales don't pick up because of the recession I can at least make good paperwork habits.

An unexpected benefit of writing my artist's statement

The Ice is Cracking

Caroline Roberts 2008

30"x40" acrylic on canvas

Driven partly by my goals for this year, and partly by mild panic that I will have an exhibition at my local coffee shop in March (yay!), I have started to write my artist's statement. "What, you didn't have one already?" I hear you cry. Well, frankly, no, I didn't. Not for the same reasons as Deborah Paris mentions (although I don't disagree with her), but because I just hadn't written one. Until September if I had the thinking time then I was in the studio and my artist's statement would have read "I make art because I like it and it pleases me. I use the materials I do because they are dry or dry quickly so the kids won't get their fingers into them." Honest, but perhaps too much so!

Now that my youngest is at school five mornings a week and my studio time, and therefore output, has increased, I'm using the process Alyson Stanfield outlines in her book, I'd Rather be in the Studio, essentially asking myself "What do I paint and why? What do I use and why?". I now have a rough draft that I plan to share with friends tomorrow, when they come on a studio visit and can see the paintings 'live'. No, I'm not going to share that rough draft here just yet - I want their input first because I know it has a lot of jagged edges.

“I have read too many that are pretentious and incomprehensible.” - Deborah Paris

However, rough though my draft is, I have found that the simple process of thinking about my work in a structured way has unleashed a wave of creativity. I started five new paintings this week and have ideas for two others. I haven't felt this kind of surge before, at least not without an external driving force (like a class) behind it. I think that for me, writing the artist's statement has done for me what a mission statement does for enterprises - it's given me a focus and a reason that was not clear to me before. Kind of like setting goals does but in a more abstract, higher level kind of a way.

Review and Goal Setting

2008 Review

Looking over the past year I can see some steps forward and some back. Keeping my life balanced and all the balls in the air seems to be the hardest thing for me.

• started this blog
  
• sold two paintings at one exhibition
  
• registered domain name and set up website
  
• learnt a LOT about abstract art, and art in general, from Arielle Masson at Glassell
  
• body of artwork became more cohesive
  

But my fitness goals went down the drain.

2009 Plans

This is the part I have fun with - making plans and setting goals. This year I have split my plans down by month too since I have trouble with getting overwhelmed by large, simultaneous goals.

• Get a schedule and routines in place so the little things in life don't disturb my studio time. And by 'little things' I do not mean the kids.
  
• Get a solid body of work together.
  
• Write and post at least two blog entries a week.
  
• Go to at least two exhibitions or galleries a month.
  
• Read 50 books, keeping a simple list of them. Preferably books I already own.
  
• Reread I'd Rather Be in the Studio and get art business organized.
  
• Talk to my local independent coffee shop about an exhibition.
  
• Host an Open Studio.
  
• Devise (and then follow) a study plan to hone my painting and drawing skills. Perhaps a skill a month?
  
• Get to the gym or go running at least three times a week.